Attack on interview
by Kirigiri Kyouko
Summary: A random interview with nope away Levi and his subordinates sacrificed to interview


Our heroes begin in a classroom. Well, okay It's 3 interviewers and a tiny Nemo human hybrid. Two of said interviewers are twins, one being goth and the other pale goth. The black goth is named Dark, and the pale one moon. Why? Because why not. Both however pale in comparison to the adorable tiny blonde kitten known simply as Kat. She's just simply so- "Progress with the #### Story already you brat. No one wants to hear about your s##### OC's," interrupts the dashing voice of the short little midget Levi Ackerman.

"So now you'll answer our questions?" Sunflower, the otaku and authoress inquires happily.

"Nopenopenopenopenope," the sour little captain hopes away. "Here, take these and leave me alone," he adds, leaving a Hanji and Eren behind.

"Question number one," Sunflower starts before said victims can protest. "Hanji, what are you?"

"A scientist," They respond.

"No, are you a boy or a girl?" Sunflower asks.

"Doctor," Hanji replies just as smoothly.

"What's in your pants?" Sunflower attempts again.

"Biology."

"B-but-" Sunflower stutters.

"Next question-nya," Kat responds from her shoulder.

"Eren, what erotic thoughts were you thinking when you got that nosebleed after your first transformation?" Dark Asked.

"Kill all the TITANS," he growls.

Moon grins at him. "Now that's some nosebleed worthy s### right there," he adds with a gleam in his eyes.

"I'm just gonna leave that there," Sunflower adds in a weirded out tone of voice.

"My turn-nya!" Kat interrupts.

"How are you possible?" Hanji squeals, while taking the kitten out of sunflower's hood and spinning around with her.

Sunflower glares at her. "Leave my hoodie kitten alone! Rawwwwwwrrrrrr!" She screams before hopelessly trying to steal said Kitten back.

Meanwhile, Hanji's grip had gotten too tight and said Kitten struggled. Finally she couldn't take it anymore before biting and slashing the scientists hands bloody.

Even saves her only to get mauled by the nemo kitten terror too when suddenly, Mikasa jumps out of the bushes. She grabs the kitten and throws it at Sunflower. Then she grabs a hold of Eren and begins checking him for injuries.

Kat crawls slowly back into Sunflower's hood during the semi stunned silence. "How much of a stalker are you?" Moon asks in awe.

"I'm not, I just have to protect Eren," she replies. "The precious must not be harmed," She whisper yells while stroking his hair.

Eren has recovered enough by this point to fight back a little. "Mikasa! Why did you tackle me? It's just an interview," Eren whines in protest. "Also, since when am I your precious?" He deadpan.

"Since always," she immediately replies.

"Well that's creepy," Sunflower interrupts.

"I bet I can find something worse!" Moon grins mischievously. Then he looks confused. "Hey guys, where's Hanji?" He asks nervously.

"Pleas don't. Also, they went off after TITANS a while ago-nya," Kat responds.

Moon ignores the first part and returns to grinning. "Come out of the bushes, oh disturbed evil overlords Arm in! I summon you to the interview!" Moon shouts comically.

Surprisingly said blond emerges. "You summoned suspiciously clothed mortal?" He greets casually.

"Yaaaaaaassssssss," Kat replies. "Is it true that your titan form is he man?" The kitten asks.

He shrugs. "As far as I know, I'm not a titan shifter yet. Also, who is He man?"

"You don't want to know," Sunflower replies. "So are you a dandelion, coconut, or poodle?"

He blinks at everyone for a few moments. "I'm not any of those things, but if I could choose one, it would be a dandelion because of how free they are," he replies dreaming.

Sadly, his poetic daydream was cut short by an unsuspecting horse-face. "What is it like to be a horse?" Sunflower asks without giving him a chance to run.

"For the last time I'm not a-" Suddenly Sunflower jumps on his back, causing him to bite his tongue.

"RIDE ON MY TRUSTY STALLION!" Sunflower screams and proceeds to kick him until he runs off into the sunset.


End file.
